Today in Life Instyle Stories, Kelly, The Styling Mama is addressing all issues pertaining to self-doubt. When you start to question your own abilities, you are creating a negative aura that can directly impact your prosperity and eventual success. Every single member of our community has so much to give and it begins with you. Why do you do what you do? What makes you good at your craft? These are the questions that we need to be inserting into our personal and professional lives in order to achieve bigger and better things.
I’ve realised that I have two voices in my head when it comes to business.
On one side, I’ve got the cool guy, the inspirational go-getter that cheers me on, and says, You’ve got this, you’re NAILING life as a mum and business woman. You go girl.
I like that guy.
On the other hand, we have the pessimist. He’s the little guy saying, BUT what if you fail? Who is going to like what you do and actually pay you for it? Who are YOU to be doing this?
It’s self-doubt, and it’s the party pooper of small business. It destroys confidence, inhibits creativity, and plays a huge part in the direction that a business takes (or doesn’t take).
The cycle of self-doubt
I had found myself in the middle of a transition period in my business that had me so nervous and excited that I could have peed (which sadly is not as infrequent as I’d like it to be after five babies). Yet I was in a repeated cycle of self-doubt.
I had the ideas, the passion and the tools to take my business to the next level, but I kept coming back to, Who are YOU to be doing THIS? This was despite people asking for my services. My business was progressing naturally, yet I was fighting it just in case “someone” didn’t think I was good enough.I needed to not only stop the cycle of self-doubt, but start backing myself.
Breaking the cycle of self-doubt in business
So, what’s the big “next step” in my business that has my knickers in a knot?
What I’m doing is providing a service outside of my own home. Helping others create spaces in their homes that suit their lifestyle, taste and budget.
REAL homes. REAL spaces. REAL people trusting me with their ideas and their money. And it is real-life scary. It means that my tastes, opinions and recommendations might be rejected.
It means that I will (hopefully infrequently) encounter difficult people, with high expectations and sharp words that will cut my fragile Piscean personality deeply.
But while it might intimidate the pants off me, you can’t expect to ride the good waves without getting a little bit of water splashed in your face, right?
Or be completely dunked every now and again.
Embracing the challenges
Finally backing myself feels amazing, yet I am very aware that it is not my natural “go-to” response.
I’ve made my first 5 bookings with strangers for home styling assistance and I would be lying if I thought that there weren’t going to be days that I didn’t doubt myself.
That’s pretty normal, I think. But instead of self-doubt holding me back, I’m viewing it as a challenge. The ultimate rebellion against the pessimist in me. You think I can’t? Watch me.
And so, while it might still play a role in my thought processes (I do have a slight tendency to overthink everything), I’m beginning to use it as a positive rather than continue to be dunked by self-doubt.
At the risk of sounding corny, I’m using doubt as food to feed my business. No party pooper is going to crash my business party if I can help it. Challenge accepted.